Friday, August 11, 2017

The Light at the End of the Tunnel might not be an oncoming train?

So August 1st, I went to the doctor for my semi annual and got lost and walked way too much.  Of course, I didn't take my cane.  ** sigh ** All seemed ok except that morning I'd "walked" on the glider machine - way too much walking for this old lady.  The next day, I did the Healthrider for 40 minutes and was on the floor for a cooldown stretch and getting up, the hamstring on my weaker leg went pop and oh-the pain.  I of course, didn't have my brace on - this leg has been weaker since 2008 when I had a TIA that took out some of the muscle of my left leg and since I love walking, this isn't the first time this injury has happened.  Wow, I was off my feet because even standing up, was horribly painful.  And I was so not impressed with the Lord allowing this since I am a caregiver for my husband who had 5 surgeries last year and osteomyelitis and septicemia and an incredible hatred of therapy. What could be His Plan in this, other than making me miserable, I wondered?

Well, first of all, I found I was doing everything for DH because I fell into the old trap of caregiver - rather than making the disabled person do it, it's just easier to do it myself.  That really wasn't that good for DH's brain re-development.

Then, my bringing everything to DH, limited his "walks" to 4 times a day to the bathroom and he was getting weaker and weaker which was sad because he came home from the hospital, totally ambulatory.  He was also getting more and more confused.

So, I stole his "hemi walker" and put him on a regular walker which gives him much more stability.  And because I have this injury, I've been getting him to fetch and carry for me so yesterday in addition to his 4 walks to the bathroom, he did about 8 or 9 walks getting me things and even today, I've noticed he's walking better and gaining some strength!

Also DS, a medical provider, told DH to get up and sit down several times a day which of course he has not been doing, regardless of my reminding him.  But since I am sidelined by this injury, I need him to fetch and carry stuff which means he's getting up and sitting down several times a day.

Finally his having to get me things in the fridge etc, is sort of waking his brain up. 

So "at the end of the day" (sorry but couldn't resist this overused expression!), I can see the good of my injury, painful as it is.

That is "God works good out of all, for those who love Him".  But sure took me a while to find the good in this because such a painful injury.

Finally, because I am fit and mobile, it's usually easy for me to do things but suddenly everything is difficult - a walk to the bathroom with a walker is hard.

Makes me appreciate being fit and I will greatly appreciate it again when I heal.  In difficult times, we tend to forget our blessings and sometimes God has to nudge us to remind us.  Unfortunately, God's "nudges" can get uh...painful.

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